The often-dreaded wedding toast.
A moment should be a highlight of the wedding reception, but yet can strike
fear deep into the heart of any mere mortal that isn’t an experienced public
speaker.
If you’ve been selected to give a speech at a wedding in 2026 or 2027 or are an engaged couple wanting to ensure you guests crush their speecch then this article is for you!
Introduction: Why a Wedding Toast Matters
The often-dreaded wedding toast.
A moment should be a highlight of the wedding reception, but yet can strike
fear deep into the heart of any mere mortal that isn’t an experienced public
speaker. A wedding toast is one of the most anticipated moments of a reception. Whether you’re the best man, maid of honor, friend or a proud parent, your words set the tone—funny, heartfelt, and inspiring. Done right, your toast becomes one of the evening’s highlights; done wrong, it’s remembered for all the wrong reasons.
Does the idea of giving a wedding speech/toast make you nervous?
IT SHOULD!
Want to start practicing right now? We suggest Toastmasters which is a well know organization that helps people with public speaker.
As professional DJs and MCs, our team has witnessed hundreds of wedding toasts over the years while spinning at weddings and corporate events across Los Angeles, Malibu, Beverly Hills, and Orange County. From intimate gatherings to luxury ballroom celebrations, we’ve seen what makes a toast land with impact—and what causes guests to tune out. The company owner, Lee Dyson, is also a professional Speaker, MC, and Host, bringing an added layer of expertise to guide couples and speakers through the flow of their event. This firsthand experience allows us to share expert advice on timing, delivery, and content, so you can avoid common pitfalls and give a toast that feels both personal and unforgettable. When you work with Hey Mister DJ, you’re not just hiring entertainment—you’re gaining a partner who understands how every detail, including speeches, contributes to the energy and success of your celebration.
Remember, you’ve been selected as one of only a few select people that will stand up and address the closest friends and family members of the wedding couple. The room will be silent, eyes will be on you, and all ears will be listening to every word you say.
Using our wedding toast tip “how to” guide, we’ve helped many guests totally crush it…
And well…some others who tried to wing it did not do so well…
We are going to share some tips that will set you up for success and give some pointers on microphone handling etc. This wedding speech guide covers everything from what to say, how long to talk, mic technique, and real examples—so you can deliver a speech that’s memorable (for the right reasons).
The first tip is the most important and it goes like this….just remember to give the audience a KISS!
Most wedding toast or speeches fail for 3 main reasons:
#1 Lack of preparation and rehearsing
Even Presidents, Oscar winners, and Nobel Prize recipients write and rehearse their speeches many times before going live—so why should a wedding toast be any different? Always write your speech down. Always. Never rely solely on speaking “from the heart”—the heart is often a messy, unorganized place. Some people worry that notes make a toast feel less authentic, but in reality, the opposite is true. Putting your words on paper and practicing shows you took this honor seriously. Write it down, then re-read and refine—say the same thing with fewer words. And the more you practice, the more natural and heartfelt your toast will feel in the moment.
PRO TIP: Once you have your speech finished, record yourself on video and watch it back or share with a trusted friend. Then edit and repeat until you have it polished.
#2 Length and Inappropriate content
Your toast should last 2–4 minutes, max. Time yourself. Remember, three to five people may speak back-to-back, which already adds up to 8–12 minutes. If each person goes long, guests could be stuck listening to 20+ minutes of speeches—a guaranteed energy killer. Short and meaningful always beats long and rambling.
Keep your content thoughtful and relevant to the couple, while still engaging for everyone in the room. Be true to your style. If you’re not naturally funny, don’t force jokes—they’ll fall flat. A sincere, heartfelt toast always resonates more than awkward humor.
If you are known for being witty, add light humor, but keep it inclusive and appropriate. Remember: it’s a toast, not a roast. Avoid inside jokes or content only a few people will understand.
If you’re more serious, lean into that. Share a personal story, offer heartfelt advice, or speak about your history with the couple. Authenticity always wins.
#3 Drinking too much before your speech
Even if you follow our tips, plan and rehearse perfectly, it all goes out the window if you get drunk before your speech. It’s natural for people that aren’t experienced public speakers to have nerves and want a drink to calm them, but have an accountability buddy to help monitor your alcohol intake prior to speech time.
Check out this video!
5 STEPS FOR GIVING A WEDDING TOAST/SPEECH- 2026/2027 update:
Step 1: Prepare Your Toast in Advance
Even Presidents, Oscar winners, and Nobel Prize recipients write and rehearse their speeches many times before going live—so why should a wedding toast be any different? Always write your speech down. Always. Never rely solely on speaking “from the heart”—the heart is often a messy, unorganized place. Some people worry that notes make a toast feel less authentic, but in reality, the opposite is true. Putting your words on paper and practicing shows you took this honor seriously. Write it down, then re-read and refine—say the same thing with fewer words. And the more you practice, the more natural and heartfelt your toast will feel in the moment.
- Write it down: Even if you don’t read word-for-word, notes help keep your thoughts organized.
- Keep it personal, not generic: Share a story only you could tell—guests love authenticity.
- Avoid inside jokes: If it won’t land with 90% of the room, skip it.
HOT TIP: Unless you have a photographic memory, no matter how many times you rehearse, don’t try to go from memory. You may forget a key point and regret it later or lose focus and start to ramble. I know some people worry that using notes doesn’t feel authentic, but I promise you that a short and meaningful toast will always trump a long rambling one and so using notes keeps you on track.
If you use paper, make sure you INCREASE THE SIZE OF THE TEXT before you print so it’s easy to read in lower light conditions. We also recommend using note cards since they are smaller and cleaner than full-size sheets. You can also use your phone or iPad but make sure you have it opened to the screen BEFORE you are called up to speak to avoid dead air or awkward pauses.
Step 2: Follow a proven Formula
Here’s a structure that works every time:
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Introduce yourself (and how you know the couple).
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Share a brief story or memory (funny, sweet, or both).
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Compliment the couple (why they’re great together).
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Offer a wish or blessing (future happiness, adventure, family).
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Raise your glass and toast.
Your toast should last 2–4 minutes, max. Time yourself. Remember, three to five people may speak back-to-back, which already adds up to 8–12 minutes. If each person goes long, guests could be stuck listening to 20+ minutes of speeches—a guaranteed energy killer. Short and meaningful always beats long and rambling. Time yourself when you practice and record yourself on video so you can adjust, or run it by someone you trust to give you honest feedback.
Keep your content thoughtful and relevant to the couple, while still engaging for everyone in the room. Be true to your style. If you’re not naturally funny, don’t force jokes—they’ll fall flat. A sincere, heartfelt toast always resonates more than awkward humor.
If you are known for being witty, add light humor, but keep it inclusive and appropriate. Remember: it’s a toast, not a roast. Avoid inside jokes or content only a few people will understand.
If you’re more serious, lean into that. Share a personal story, offer heartfelt advice, or speak about your history with the couple. Authenticity always wins.
Always be sure that you speak to both the bride and groom (Or grooms – brides for LGBTQ or couple for non-gender specific). Even if you hardly know the groom it’s bad form to go on for 3 minutes about the bride and say nothing about the groom and vice/versa so be sure to say something nice about both. Always find a way to finish the toast by focusing on the two of them and what a great couple they are together.
Step 3: Nail the Delivery
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Mic Technique: Hold the mic a fist-length from your mouth, and don’t move it around.
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Eye Contact: Look at the couple and the audience, not just your notes.
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Pacing: Speak slower than normal—you’ll be nervous, and nerves make us speed up.
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Smile: Your warmth matters as much as your words.
Step 4: Avoid the Common Mistakes
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Don’t drink too much before you speak.
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Don’t embarrass the couple with awkward stories.
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Don’t make it about yourself.
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Don’t wing it—rehearse at least once.
- Only add humor carefully
Step #5: Rehearse like a Pro
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Read it out loud at least three times.
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Time yourself to stay under four minutes and record yourself on video for playback.
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Practice with a friend for feedback.
When In Doubt Follow This Simple Formula:
- Introduce yourself and how you are related to the couple/bride/groom.
- Thank both families and whoever funded the wedding.
- Talk briefly about your primary friend (bride/groom) and your relationship. If appropriate tell a short/entertaining story. (ONLY 1 story)
- Talk about why the spouse is such a great match.
- Finish with a quote, sentimental thought, or well-wishing to the couple.
- Cheers and hug the couple!
Getting Emotional
It’s okay to get emotional if you can keep your composure and finish the speech. This is another reason that you should practice the speech several times in advance. If you get emotional take a moment to compose but then push through.
If for any reason you feel you can’t continue, then it’s best to wrap it up by going over and hugging the couple instead of standing there and letting things get awkward.
If It Goes Sideways
If a toaster rambles too long, gets inappropriate or is just bombing then the couple should give a look to the DJ or wedding coordinator. In severe situations the DJ fade up the music and walk over to take the microphone back from the toaster. However, a smoother way to handle this is for the bride or groom to walk up and hug them so that it’s less obvious that they are being cut off.
Additional Tips for your Wedding Speech:
Where to stand?
It depends on the room layout and where the couple is located. But usually, the best place to stand is adjacent to the sweetheart table so that your back is not turned to the room. Now you can look over occasionally to the couple but also address all the guests.
If the couple don’t have a sweetheart table and are seated at a long bridal table, then sometimes you have to stand on the dance floor, but again, find a position that will allow you to face the majority of the room.
The DJ or MC will most likely stand where they want you to be positioned when they call you up to the microphone. However, It’s best to check in with the wedding planner or photographer to confirm your standing location.
If there is a Videographer, they will need to know exactly where toasters are standing because they need to light that spot in advance.
How Should I Hold the Mic?
The closer the mic is to your lips, the better, as long as you aren’t making contact with it. Speak at a level slightly louder than a conversational tone and NEVER cup the mic..
Remember to keep the mic centered at your lips, and don’t let your mic arm move around as you gesture to make a point.
Don’t forget to bring your drink with you.
Decide in advance if you will hold your drink in your free hand.
If you are using notes, then have a plan for where you’ll set your drink down until it’s time to toast at the end. (Usually, you can place your drink on the sweetheart table)
As an award winning DJ company here in Southern California (Los Angeles), we take a lot of pride in making sure every part of your wedding goes smoothly. We are always available to help coach our clients prior to the wedding day.
Hiring an experienced & professional MC is another way to help ensure everything goes smoothly. An amazing MC will work with your guests to calm their nerves and set them up for success with the crowd.
We also make sure to sync with the wedding planner so we are on the same page regarding the timeline. This way, if a speech runs long we can make a game time decision to add in a break before the remaining speeches or take other action to balance the vibe.
10 Great Topics to Include in Your Wedding Toast
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Thank the Parents and Hosts
Acknowledge the parents (and anyone else who helped) for organizing such an amazing wedding. Gratitude always sets the right tone. -
Share a Short Story About the Couple’s Early Days
Whether it’s a memory from school, work, or when they first met, a quick story gives guests a glimpse into their history. -
Highlight Your Best Memory of the Couple Together
A heartfelt or funny moment that captures their bond helps everyone connect with your perspective. -
Recall a Favorite Trip or Vacation Moment
Travel stories often bring out humor, adventure, and insights into the couple’s dynamic. -
Explain How One Partner Made the Other a Better Person
Point out positive changes you’ve seen since they met—it’s a meaningful compliment to both. -
Share Something the Couple Did That Impressed You
Whether it’s an accomplishment, a kind gesture, or how they support others, highlight what makes them special. -
Talk About Your Relationship With the Couple
Share what they mean to you personally, and why being part of their day is an honor. -
Describe Their Unique Dynamic as a Couple
Emphasize why they’re so perfect for each other—funny, supportive, adventurous, or simply inseparable. -
End With a Meaningful Quote or Song Lyric
Wrap up your toast with a thoughtful quote about love or a lyric that captures their journey. It gives your speech a polished, memorable finish. -
Offer a Warm Wish for Their Future Together
Close with a heartfelt blessing, hope, or wish—whether it’s for endless laughter, adventure, or simply a lifetime of love. This ties your toast back to the purpose of the day: celebrating their union.
HOT TIP– Reach out to the other guests giving a toast and trade notes to be sure each of you has a genuinely original speech that doesn’t repeat too many points from another speech.
12 Things You Should Never Do in a Wedding Toast
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Don’t overdrink before your toast — cap yourself at two drinks max.
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Don’t mumble — enunciate clearly so everyone can hear.
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Don’t bring up exes — ever.
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Don’t make it about yourself — this is the couple’s moment, not your autobiography.
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Don’t swear — keep it family-friendly.
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Don’t tell stories that pre-date the couple — stick to memories that celebrate their relationship.
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Don’t use the toast to make amends — not the time to repair old drama.
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Don’t joke about marriage itself — in-laws and family may not find it funny.
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Don’t forget eye contact — engage both the couple and the audience.
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Don’t pass the mic — only planned speakers should have the floor.
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Don’t tell boring or self-indulgent stories — choose something the entire room will appreciate.
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Don’t go on too long — keep it under 4 minutes; short, sweet, and memorable always wins. ✅
